442- Antidepressants on hold

As posted on social media, yesterday marked the end of an era, began in February of this year. Brace yourself for a slightly longer read than there, with a trigger warning of content I didn't mention.

441 - Terrorism ptsd

This entry has a medium length, and I suggest you get fully prepared psychologically if the topic at hand is difficult for you, because Multiple trigger warnings apply to its 1,292 words and all the links, both within my blog and the external that I included at the end.

440- Tools for Post-Traumatic healing and growth

Grab a cuppa, 1476 words coming your way!

In 2018, I had read this book (in French) about ptsd and resilience, finding several tools in it, and wanted to discuss that topic in more details that in my review. I kept the draft aside, and forgot all about it, so it's time to tackle it. 

439 - Trauma, self care and mental health

Image credit: photo and edit by myself.
5 months of composition result in a 1,316 words long entry, as well as 4 previous entries and 3 articles in hyperlinks, grab a cuppa if you intend to read them all, and some elements have a trigger warning, both here and elsewhere.

I intended and labelled this blog both for mental health topics and lifestyle, talking at length about my traumatic life experiences and struggles, but seldom about lifestyle.  To correct this imbalance, I had posted
entry 417, where I introduced you to my personal grooming routines. I can now explain how this self-care and my overall lifestyle link with my mental health and more specifically, to healing and post-traumatic growth. 

438- BLM 2 : all lives matter is hypocrisy, ignorance or insensitivity

I'm going to state something that some of you will agree, and others won't, but I must be a bit controversial here. After George Floyd's murder, the Black Lives Matter movement became a lot more visible in protests and online. Some acted as if this was new, not realizing that the movement was launched in 2013 and that the systemic racial inequalities and injustices have been going on for centuries before this... 

437- A second quirky project

here comes a medium length entry with 968 words.

In late may, I posted my first quirky project, following Willowing's video. Via comments, she said she'd love to see a butterfly by me.

436- Still here but slow

image credit : myself, it's a sketch I did back in July 2016. One of my shortest entries comes with 334 words bellow.

Hello everyone, you may have noticed that I don't post as often as I used to, especially in the high, busy periods when twitter's mental health community was giving challenges and material to think about and discuss... 

435 - Art as a gift

note: this entry's longer than I thought, grap a cuppa, it's 1,233 words long.

As announced in post 432, I'd resumed making art, both for the sake of art, and for a therapeutic goal of self expression, and personal growth. 

In that entry, I explained a few background factors about my struggles with self esteem and my rare usage of art as a form of self expression, due to those struggles. 

434- BLM 1

It has been over 2 weeks since George Floyd's murder and the start of new riots in USA. Thus far, I have been only sharing articles and memes on social media, concentrating on Facebook and Twitter. I was able to edit this blog's background from my lavender photo into the above support of the BLM movement, a copyright free image that I further edited for the purpose of this blog entry, with the added text. 

433- Cancer Survivor Day

I almost forgot to post as I was busy doing art today (and also correcting) some... 

This black ribbon is for skin cancer awareness/skin cancer survivors.
Yes, you read that right, I had blogged about my diagnosis, surgery & post-op about 2 years here on this very blog, under keyword DFSP.

432 - Resuming Art

(get a cuppa, this entry is 1,783 words long, when you start with the normal fonts).

In 2016, I had posted several entries with my art of that same year as well as some pieces from 2004 until that point, and then I stopped. In the last blog entry about my art, numbered 154, ending 2016, I'd specified that I hadn't taken photos of our xmas decorations, intending to snap some shots and make another entry to post them as well as new art I'd make, and then I simply forgot all about both resolutions, making no new art for several years, until now! 

431- Trauma lemonades and post-traumatic silver linings

(copyright free image, edited by me. Hope you notice the mashed in word trauma inside the lemonade. Hereafter, 1,639 words). 

I think all my readers know by now that I've experienced multiple forms of trauma in my childhood and youth, resulting in several ptsd's and cptsd's, which have plagued my entire life with lasting effects, symptoms, difficulties and struggles. I wrote about all of these quite extensively, though I feel it cannot ever be exhaustive as that'd require entire (auto/)biographies. 

Thus far, however, I never discussed any positive aspects, either of my traumatic life, or of my struggles with mental illnesses. I had planned to do that 2 years ago, after seeing Sophie Harrison's blog entries about silver linings she'd found in her life, but finding positives in my case have always been tough, so I'd forgotten the entire idea and let time slide by without even starting a draft, until late April. 

430- Psychotherapy online 2020-04-28

My last psychotherapy session in early February was still in person. I was to have my following on 27 April, but due to current covid19 lockdown, my appointment was moved to 28th, and from his office, to an online version. 

In view of content, Trigger warning applies. 

429 - My first antidepressant experience

The image above uses a copyright-free, marked for reuse with modification, of the paroxétine molecule, the medication I'm discussing in this entry.


Trigger warning for emetophobia content as well as depression related material, at the side effects section

For years and years, I suffered my various mental illnesses, trying my best to get by and cope, starting with maladaptive and then developing some adaptive coping skills, accepting therapies and support from mental health activists who became friends, but had refused any kind of medication, due to several reasons, such as fear of developing an addiction, but also on ethical grounds as medicines are tested on animals in France and don't always have veg-friendly ingredients.

428- CBT4Emeto - 32

It has been a over two months since I last posted about my CBT4Emeto sessions, so today I correct this oversight with session 32, from 17/02/2020, the last to date, due to covid19's postponement of my sessions until further notice.

Henceforth, my habitual trigger warnings are reiterated.       

427- Covid19 : let's cope in unity

Everyone says we're living in a strange, unique, difficult time, and in many ways, this is true. 
In this period of uncertainty, fears and isolation, we are going through a collective trauma as individuals, families, friends, cities, nations, and the entire world. 

426- Meditation APP Insight Timer

All credits go to the app creators. This is merely a post about my experiences with this ap in particular, and meditation in general. 

I wasn't paid. This isn't publicity, only personal experiments and learning. 

Last June, my psychotherapist gave me, for the first time, the advice to meditate daily, as a tool to combat my cptsd, to calm myself and to reduce some of the symptoms. Back then, he had said to use Petit Bambou, which I subsequently tried and reviewed. 

425- Toxic friendships: Unhealthy boundaries

Trigger Warning for mentioned DV and cult related stuff, and also, this is a long one - 2,401 words, hereafter. 

Toxicity is something which, in my opinion, should remain only with toxic products. Yet, many people in our lives can prove to have toxic effects upon our well-being ; they are those one-sided relationships where you don't ever get any sort of equilibrium in benefits ; they are those where a person abuses the kindness, energy and time of the other, for their own selfish goals. 

By more specific definition, a toxic partner's actions will be emotionally, and/or physically damaging to their partner. These often drain us emotionally and/or physically, most often diminishing our self-esteem and making us question what we've done wrong, and yet, it is these people who should ask themselves these questions. 

424- Turning back the clock : my earliest one sided friendships

In attempting to compose an entry about toxic friendships, I realized that I had to turn back the clock to my earliest ones, where I ended up being the 1-sided person, because of my circumstances. 

Here, mild trigger warnings apply, for content about religious cults. 

423- Expanded review on Book Trouver son propre chemin

Book – Trouver son propre chemin

Full title adds : Un guide pour redéfinir le sense de sa vie et réussir l'essentiel 

Translation of the title : Finding one's own path, a guide to redefine one's Life's meaning and succeed in essentials 

Author: Isabelle Filliozat

Score: 0/10
Year: 1992

Publisher: Belfond

ISBN 9782266076302

Pages  282*

Language: French 

I posted an original entry on Media Garden, my reviews blog. Today, I want to expand on it here, to showcase why I felt it contains dangerous topics, in contrast to the real terminologies. To avoid full copy paste, I'll let you read that review first, and then come back for quoted passages. 

422- Trimmer Jacques Provost 0589

As discussed in post 417, my current shaving routine alternates 2 main tools - the rotary blade shaver by SweetLF, and this cheap but rather impressive small trimmer, which I paid about 12€ in a local mall!! 


First, I'll remind you that '' I may discuss brands I tested, but I am in no way endorsing their practices (which I'm not aware of)  and am not being paid to mention them, either. This is purely a personal experience, pros and cons I find in self-care routines and products I use for them."

421 - Electric shaver SweetLF SWS7105

If you recall post 417 about my current self-care routines, I mentioned that I started using this electric shaver a few months ago. Today, I want to detail this model, SW-S7105 from SweetLF.

I'll remind you that '' I may discuss brands I tested, but I am in no way endorsing their practices (which I'm not aware of)  and am not being paid to mention them, either. This is purely a personal experience, pros and cons I find in self-care routines and products I use for them."

420- From He to They

Most of my readers know that I grew up in a religious cult, where, among other things, gender norms were instilled in me as an integral part of the dogma, and as such, I was to be, and to represent, solely my birth gender male - given to me by 'god'. Any deviation in gender norm, as well as in sexuality, were sins, punishable with eternal damnation, and losing my privileged spot in heaven. 

419- Psychotherapy 2020-02-03

I barely blogged here in 2019, so before I go into today's psychotherapy, let me catch up first with my previous session, dating 12th of September 2019. 

418- CBT4Emeto - 30-31

Continuing my exposure tasks for the last few CBT4Emeto sessions have usually been difficult but brought steady progression. 

Today I shall discuss sessions 30-31, from 13/01 and from today, 28/01/2020. 

Henceforth, my habitual trigger warnings are reiterated.       

417- Personal grooming and self-care routines

grab a cuppa, 2,214 words coming your way!

I've concentrated on mental health topics in most of my entries, and thought to offer a slightly different one, to encompass once more a post on lifestyle.

Today, I want to talk about my personal grooming, these self-care routines that I do, either daily, often, or sometimes.

Disclaimers:

I may discuss brands I tested, but I am in no way endorsing their practices (which I'm not aware of)  and am not being paid to mention them, either. This is purely a personal experience, pros and cons I find in self-care routines and products I use for them.

Similarly, all pics are used only to showcase some of them, and do not aim any monetary goal, and since I don't currently have the tools for proper product photography at home, I use what I find online, and do intend copyright infrigements. 

416- CBT4Emeto - 27-29

My exposure tasks for the last few CBT4Emeto sessions have usually been the same ones, so I had decided to avoid a repetitious posting on individual sessions. , 

Today I'm working on catching up, and shall discuss sessions 27 to 29.  Their dates were 21/11, 5 and 6/12/2019.

Henceforth, my habitual trigger warnings are reiterated.