312- My extended and elected family tree

 

This entry describes the people that I'd include in my family tree, but not in a genealogical sense. 

As of June 2021, I've hid original shoutout blog entries and replaced with edited one, which omit shout-outs to people I lost touch with, who have used and discarded me, and others who were plain nasty. This entry is one such entry. 

My biological family can be divided in groups. 

The first group is the paternal side, with which I start only because it's a dead tree, though not dead in the physical sense. It's the part of my family with which I cut all ties, due to my father's abuse of me, and since he's a manipulator, I had to cut ties with the entire family, including siblings, grand-parents and uncles etc. It's a shame, because I wanted to stay in touch with my grand-father and maybe siblings but that wasn't possible. 

The second group is my maternal side, with my mother, her sister and their mother. This tree is okay, though not the most supportive at times, it's still my core in life.

Then, comes the group of friends, starting with : 

The third group is my wife. The one person who has been the most patient and supportive in my recovery and thanks to whom I got involved in more friendships, in renewed therapy, and propelled me into blogging, which in turn has been hugely beneficial and expansive.

The fourth are the local friends we made, some of which are vegan ; people with whom we share easy meals, movies, games (social and video), some visits, talks and sometimes go on trips or hikes. Thus, Marco, Anaïs, Antony. 

The biggest group, in terms of members, is the one for my online friends, some in France (but not many left) and all the ones abroad, with an absolute majority in the UK and who belong in most cases to the MH community, though some aren't. It is comprised by Carole, whom I met in classes years ago, shared a time and lost touch, reuniting 7 years later, and who is now mostly an online friend as she lives in Paris. But also Ains, met online over 15 years ago ; her sister Ros  ; Anna ; and most of the others are from twitter MH community. I feel closest with Laura, Meg, Hannah, Rachel, Angela, Cerian, Connie, Katie. 

This fifth tree, therefore, has many roots and branches and a very thick trunk. It extends through France to the UK, Germany, USA, Australia.  

Out of all the guys that I met in life or online, I like the best to chat with Keith (and also his wife Sharon), introduced to me by my wife. I loved chatting with Jimi (Katie's hubby), though we don't get to chat all that often. 

The other friendships I made online aren't so close or long duration as most of the named persons above ; the order isn't an exact one either, nor scientifically quantifiable. It's just that I feel closer to the people out of all those I had briefer discussions with.

All my life, I had difficulties bonding and keeping friendships ; but, to me, they are highly important and I'm a loyal friend as far as it depends on me. My attachment to family by blood isn't strong or vital, outside of the few that I do care about and are there for me. But since the majority of my talks and emotional attachments as well as support come from outside of my blood relations, I elect and extend my family to my friends. 

I have met most of you online, throughout 2017 ; Some I've known longer, and I can see in both cases, the potential for coming closer and deepening friendships in the times ahead. I thank you all for your friendships, laughs, support, kindness and exchanges, and here's to more in 2018! Cheers!