288 - Oct 6 to Nov 6 exposures and CBT2017-24

Today was the 24th, and last CBT session purely for social phobia. Next one will be the final update to it with the results of my third Liebowitz scale of social anxiety (LSAS) that I'll fill and hand to my therapist in 3 weeks-time. 


Since the 23rd session  I noticed several changes in my exposures as follows :

1. Some of them have become easier for me to do, and I no longer think of them as chores. These are the shopping errands, which I'm now able to do, even in rush hour and once, even on a Saturday at Noon, the busiest time of the week in the mall. It's also the same for shopping in supermarkets and the street market. 
2. As a result, I hadn't even taken the time to jot down all these exposures, though I can produce the dates of each, thanks to book keeping. 
3. On the other hand, I still do note the bigger exposures and challenges, such as that weekend with a friend's huge birthday party with up to 30 people ; and a visit from my wife's cousin and his boyfriend, and a local friend, in the next day. I told all about it in post 282. These were October 14 & 15. 
4. On the 19th, we went to the cinema as a self gift for our birthdays. As it was an exceptional viewing of a Hitchcock movie (shadow of a doubt), the venue was full, all except for one row. I didn't even feel anxiety in that instance, which is a huge difference with the first couple years of going to the movies, where much emptier rooms used to give me such anxiety and near-panic on numerous occasions, that this first instance of 0% anxiety has to be noted. 
5. On the same day, and just before the movie to which we arrived far too early, we decided to have a drink in café, right next to the cinema. There, the barista explained his machine had just been washed and was therefore out of order, and told us of what we could order. As I didn't understand fully, I made him repeat, something that I didn't used to do with strangers, and instead of going to another, we remained there. I also requested a spoon when I had to sweeten and stir my tea ; the old me wouldn't have dared. 
6. A birthday party with my family went better than usual and as soon as they started talking about depressive topics, I mentioned I had to go back home, as I had an appointment with a friend to have our first skype. Thus, I managed to cut short any unpleasantries, and had a wonderful first session with this friend, and again, another friend the following, day, on the 22.
7. As usual, I participated to weekly twitter MH chats, and to another campaign run by Time to change, by passing along a 200-word-long text through one of its young champions, who is a friend, Jodie. This is note-worthy because I used to avoid such participation, out of paranoia about my father finding me, and now have participated in chats numerous times, and a few campaigns.
8. I discussed the fact that with improved coping skills for social phobia in social situations, I wish to join, in the near future, a mental health charity or something equivalent and since I only know the UK and USA ones, I asked if she knew any. She gave me a name that I'll look up later this week and get the ball rolling. 

The 25th CBT session, scheduled for 27/11 will be a transition one. 

• In the first half, we'll discuss the results of my Liebowitz scale and 
• in the second half, she'll see how she can help me in regards to my emeto and3 other interwoven phobias, based on the printed translated blog entries 74 ; 151 & 280

That's all for now, but expect a conclusion to my CBT for social phobia in the next few days.