155- Shopping with social phobias (2) - learning to cope

Usually, shopping can be quite daunting and causes much anxiety. It happens on the way to the store, in it, and on the way back. But, over the years, I've been avoiding rush hours, preferring the off-hours of early morning - when the medium age of all shoppers with me is over 65. 
Yes, I admit, for many years, I have been getting up early enough to reach the stores to avoid waiting in line for too long, and to have fewer shoppers around me (just like I told in post 26) 


As I learned in the past 7 months of CBT, my constant avoidance of challenging social situations has been a factor in the worsening of my social phobias,  so, with the guidance of both my therapists (especially my CBT one), I have had to accept staying in stores longer and longer. 
Recent exposures have also informally extended the task : I had to learn to go to stores outside of my comfort zone of off-hours, and remain in supermarkets, malls and other stores during rush hours, even in pre-christmas period. 

I also had to dare and ask for directions and help (to  find a product, for example). 

And you know what I learned ? that I could do it, survive it and not have as much anxiety anymore. 

Even yesterday as I arrived to the register and found out a tomate sauce had exploded in my shopping cart which I had to clean while the cashier helped by cleaning the products. 

I felt quite anxious during the early stages of this incident, asking myself if she'd charge my sauce and what all other customers would say or do... 

My cashier was cool, however ; she made light of it, funny jokes and pointed out it could have much worse, and this helped alleviate my anxiety quite a bit, especially since she redirected all new customers to the other lines as she temporarily closed her register - I didn't even have to say anything to anyone and talked only with the cashier, as well as the one directly next to her, and the security guy who had to come check the content (they always do it when we bring in our own carts, to make sure there are no thefts).

I was glad when it was over and I could put my groceries back in the mostly clean, paper towel and plastic bag padded shopping cart (the cashier had put all my products in plastic bags, to avoid further problems on my way home). 

But, this experience which could have been a lot worse regarding my social anxiety was painless and the cashier to whom I apologized profusely was very understanding and nice. 

This and all the various exposure tasks I had to perform in the past 7 months have helped me not have a panic attack and cope with the unexpected situation rather well - though it was quite unpleasant. 

I'll end this on a positive note and say that with practice and constant exposures, going out of my comfort zone, I shall one day make it to a functional level... till next time, I'll see you around!