65- Special edition 2 : Mental health awareness month (12) - support 2

With Kay ska’s permission, I share a vlog she posted during MHW2K16, regarding support systems.

Even though I shall come back to it with more detail, the main goal of this post is to bring attention to an online therapy available in the UK+New Zealand, and which Kay found very helpful : Big White Wall

Just like her, I had difficulties finding a proper CBT therapist.

I’d been followed by a normal psychiatrist for some time already and when I asked to see him more frequently so he could help me understand and fix my social anxieties, he suggested a CBT and gave me a few numbers to call as in France, CBT is a specialty and my therapist hadn’t studied it.

After a few calls to therapists who had all told me that they were booked and couldn’t take anyone new, or not for at least 6 months, I found someone who accepted to see me just over 2 months later.

Believing that I needed a quick appointment, I took that one, but as it turned out, this particular therapist and me didn’t mesh well at all because I felt worse after each session with him, and that he was rather condescending towards me and always asked me to make lists of the various situations I had anxieties in – refusing to accept that fact that all of them did.

He offered no support; no tips to guide me deal with social events I had to attend.

Sessions with him were a bit sporadic, once a month or two, and he was systematically late.

Research led me to understand that his method wasn’t exactly a norm and I put an end to this therapy, which lasted over a year, and another took some time to find. It won’t start until the end of May.

I reiterate that it’s highly important to all patients to feel comfortable and trusting with a therapist, as progress in any kind of health issue – and this is also the case in mental health. Many patients lack self-confidence and it can be difficult to stand up for your rights. But, if you feel a therapist isn’t helping, you must point it out and if he won’t budge and get things done, don’t hesitate to seek another.

If you read me from the UK and need some therapy, the one that Kay found very helpful is called Big White Wall, where you can assess your situation, expression how you feel and possibility find others who suffer from the same issues.

There is also a blog post about this Big White Wall, here

Contrary to Kay and the possibilities in the UK, France seems to lack regarding therapy and access to it. Not only CBT is a specialty that few therapists learn, but also, here, you must find a psychiatrist who does CBT, in order to have medical coverage, whilst a psychologist will always cost you out of pocket, between 50 and 60 € per 30 to 45 minutes session, which can become quite fast a huge investment.

We don’t seem to have access to online therapy either.

Like Kay, I have difficulties asking for help, even from my friends. However, I came to the conclusion that without a therapist guiding me through, my own readings and research wouldn’t bring me fast enough to develop my social skills and become self-sufficient, and that is why I had tried to get professional help.