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The concept of gender is one of the most present labels in our society and have probably been for a long time ... Whom and what defined ''a man'',''being male'','' ''a woman'' and ''being female''? after all, these concepts apart from the apparent biological aspect, but also based on social criteria changes and evolve over time and across countries...
I am often told that I am "effeminate"; I walk like a woman, in a "feminine way" ; my hobbies, interests and tastes are ''feminine '' ... so what?! What is it to you that I am "effeminate", that I like writing in pink, purple or blue?
I walk 'like a woman' or my physical appearance is not filled with huge biceps and I am unable to lift large machines that make huge noises? hell, sometimes I see social prejudices categorize me and lock me in a corner, that corner made by certain backward mentalities of people who did not follow the social changes of the last decades ...
Eg, a few years ago in a yahoo chatroom , I typed in pink ... a man came to hit on me, thinking that I must be a woman ; that he could charm me and ask me meet with him ... and during a full hour didn't believe me that I was 'a man' ... to the point of having to start my webcam and prove it! And the guy still couldn't believe me !!! as if I had to lower my pants to show him once and for all .... (denied of course) ...
He demonstrated his closed mind telling me that I was faking my camera and that I was actually a woman ... all because he associated pink with female ... certainly easy to do but I have repeated several times that colors have no gender! Our values decide it ... these are the values of a society that has decided that girls should play with pink toys and boys with blue and red full of violence ... Ill-proportionate Barbies for girls, warriors for the boys ... The nurse sets for girls, robots for boys ... and so on!
Elsewhere, a colleague saw that I had trouble closing a very heavy door came to slam it with force and called me ... nothing less than gay, because that was the only explanation he had for the 'weak sissy' that I was for him... his words made me laugh bitterly, in inner consternation of his close mindedness and his radical bias ... For the record, I'm straight, but my preference has nothing to do with my physical strength...
So, what about me? I like pink, blue, purple, colors ... I also like clothes with floral decorations and, despite my social phobias I sometimes cannot resist complimenting people (who happen to be women) who wear such clothes, swallowing my extreme shyness...
I have recently worn floral clothes also, and that's it ... if some want to believe that I am a woman, well, I do not govern thoughts.... I have enough to do!
Yes, I walk 'like a woman' ', and like things called feminine, and I'm more in touch with my ''feminine'' side than my ''masculine'', which I rejected after a very bad image I have of this gender... but all these details matter little to me ...
People have the right to think what they want, even if they are prejudiced, provided they do not hurt nor beat me because of ''feminine appearance'' ...
It would be nice though that people finally understand...
Fortunately, my friends understand and do not judge me in this regard ... and those who did were deleted ...
addendum 15 June 2020 : some time after the initial publication of this entry, I realized, through research, that these all fall under my nonbinary/gender queer identification, to which I arrived very late in life.
I also wanted to specify that after having seen what damage bigotry against lgbtqa+ people, that I no longer think it's ok for people to have the right to think in prejudice but to shift towards education against it, as much as possible.
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